Day Eleven

Today was a great day...
My kids at school were so good last week for the sub! I am so proud of them. I took off last week to get off my feet and take advantage of having Gary, my hubbies mom here! She is the best cook, and I had the opportunity to cook with her for a week! It was great! Also, my mom was here and it was wonderful to have her company during the egg retrieval and the transfer. In fact the two grandma's were able to see their grandcells last week!

As far as today and waiting it is certainly tough! I was thinking I might have to drive to San Jose for my blood test on Friday which would prove to be impossible to get there and back to school on time...So I might have to wait until Saturday! Which is not a bad thing at all....because by then the HCG would be good and high by then if I was pregnant.

On the flipside of that, I am a bit fearful for Friday because I dont want my kids at school to see me upset!It is extremely difficult to hold back the tears when you find out you are not pregnant, and the kids see you crying. All of them are like, "What is wrong Mrs. Bannister?" and I respond, "Oh, nothing!"
I have been at school for all the phone calls of every IUI result. The first couple were not to bad because at that time you don't fully understand the gravity of the whole situation. After a couple more the disappointment truly begins to set in. After the IVF that one was tough. I just have to remember that not everything is done in our time and that God has a plan.
I have a great friend Christy Sheedy who told me the story of her first miscarriage and how she couldn't see the whole picture. She was so mad and upset. A couple months later when she conceived again her and her husband were in a better place financially for her to quit her job and be a stay at home mom. During this time of her pregnancy her mother was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. Christy had the opportunity to be by her mom's side that year. She talked about how she got to know her in way she had never known her and to top it off, her mother became a Christian that year! Christy was saying if she had not miscarried she would have probabaly never quit her job to be a stay at home mom and she would of missed the last year of her mom's life. Talk about a divine plan! I just have to rest in His arms and know that Christ would do nothing to harm me! Pray that I continue to understand that there is a divine plan in all of this!